Swipe Right for Love

In decades past dating was a whole other world than that of the people who are single now. Some say that having dating options right at our fingertips should make it easier. Sure, logging onto a dating site full of people looking for a partner sounds easy. Hundreds, thousands of individuals looking for that person for a night or to travel the journey we call life with and everything in between the two. Is it really easier though? 

Pulling up the different dating sites, no names are needed as they are all mostly the same concept. A few pictures, 200 characters or less about a person, basic interests, and what they are looking for. Swiping left for no and right for yes. Looking for someone that captures your interest and then hoping they find you interesting right back. Then there are the beginning awkward conversations; the hello’s, the "what are you looking for?", overused lines, or sometimes a singular emoji. All in hopes of finding someone or some few that you click or “vibe” with as the kids say. Most of those matches never get past the initial, “How was your day?”. That’s what dating looks like now.  Mindlessly swiping left or right on a person’s photos and a few sentences long bio. When did we stop swiping right on actual connections, feelings, and even the dreaded word love? 

Finding love may be right at our fingertips, through the screen of our phones but are we really giving love a chance or are we pigeonholing people into what we find acceptable instead of seeking valid connection? Love isn’t a Disney movie, love isn’t even the same thing for everyone. Sometimes love is just finding that unexpected person that helps give your life a whole level of depth, long thought impossible. People aren’t just pictures, they aren’t 200 characters or less; people are feelings, beliefs, hopes, dreams, and so much more. 

This doesn’t mean online dating is terrible because it is absolutely not, you can meet so many individuals. You can absolutely also find exactly what you're looking for. It’s the mentality that online dating has turned into. The total lack of sincerity that can be displayed, the disappointment, and then the inability of reaching out of a comfort zone to experience someone new. Feels like the people that find someone are one in a million chances. 

So maybe instead of a face, it’s time to swipe right on love. Find a way to let your personality shine in your interactions, and reach out with an open mind. Give yourself the time to get past the initial getting-to-know stage and have full-on conversations. Talk about the things you enjoy, and express interest in the psyche of the people you talk to. Don’t ask how their morning was, ask them something that leads to a conversation. It doesn’t have to be important. The way you learn a person is through all kinds of conversations including whimsy. For example, ask, “Iron Man or Captain America?”. Love comes from connection, the connection comes from learning from someone, and learning sometimes starts with giving people actual chances. So next time you're ready to swipe your finger across your screen, read and find the ones whose personality shines through their words.